Thursday, 26 September 2013

A Word From The Wise



Two years ago for Christmas day my mum gave me this book titled "A Word From The Wise". It is a book of quotations put together by Rosemarie Jarski and organised into their topics - for example: happiness, acceptance, books. There aren't many times I've been thinking of a specific topic that I want to find a quote about and not found it in this book. My mum knows me so well, I've always loved and been fascinated by quotes. In fact, at my old house one of my entire bedroom walls was covered with many of my favourite quotes. So as you can imagine, this present was a hit. 

What I love about my mum's presents are that the special ones are always so personal. She'll probably give me money or something else I've asked for at Christmas and on my birthday but as well as that she gives me something that is really thought-out and beautiful. We have a tradition that whenever we buy each other books we write a little message on the first page, never an essay, just a few words and my mum's are always wonderful. 

Ever since I've been given this book I often look through it and stumble across some incredible quotations and, much more often than not, I'm inspired to write by them. So I thought that when I find ones that particularly grab me I'll share them with you. 

"The human spirit is stronger than anything that can happen to it." - George C. Scott

I love this quote. I've been feeling quite stressed out today, which was odd to be because I can't think of a reason why I should be; I'm on top of my homework, school's going well, everything is great with my family, friends and Harry so it makes no sense to me that I had this feeling. I talked to Harry and my dad about it and they helped me to realise that when going through changes, which I am still in the process of doing, little things can get on top of you much more than they usually would. I think that is what has happened, a lot of little things have made me feel stressed out, and by feeling that I felt quite rough today. 

This quote reminds me that we are all so much stronger than we believe ourselves to be and while I realise that today this is just me adjusting to change and nothing incredibly complex or upsetting, it leads me to remember that I am strong, much stronger than I consider myself to be. That whatever life throws at me, although may be difficult, I will handle and will come out the other side of. And that's a bloody great thing to know, so I thought you should too. 

Monday, 23 September 2013

On A Difficult Monday

Today I was planning to write about what a wonderful weekend I've had but something happened this morning that just knocked me a bit, and I wanted to write because it made me quite sad and when I'm sad I like to write. Every Monday morning we have a senior assembly - last week my year were asked to stay behind and the head teacher told us about a boy in our year who was diagnosed with cancer when he was 11, had managed to fight it, got incredible GCSE results in the midst of it and even started our sixth form but had just found out that week that he only had a few weeks left to live, when he was expected to complete his A Levels with us.

I thought about it a lot. About how unfair life can be, he's a 16 year old boy and, from what I've heard, an absolutely amazing person. This morning they told the other years not to come to assembly, just ours, and we were told that he died early on Saturday morning. I've never experienced something like this before. It was very weird for me because I've only just joined this year and I never spoke to him, I don't know if I even saw him. And yet I felt utterly overwhelmed with sadness. But I felt like I had no right to be. I didn't know this boy and although I've heard how funny and how happy and how clever he was I didn't feel as though that justified me being upset compared with all the people around me who have known him for five years. 

There was a moment when the head was saying a few words and a boy sitting in front of me suddenly put his head in his hands and let out an uncontrollable sob, beginning to cry without showing any signs of being able to stop. That is one of the most heartbreaking things I have ever witnessed in my life; the boy who sat in front of me is probably the biggest guy in our year from what I've seen, I have a class with him and he's always laughing with friends around and to see him cry like that really made me realise how real this was. All I wanted to do was cry and cry and cry. But I still felt like I had no right, so I tried my hardest to suppress my tears. 

You never really think that something like this is going to happen. But we probably should really, because life shocks you. It comes out of nowhere and gives you things you never thought you'd be dealing with. And sometimes that's great. But when things like this happen I spend some time again wondering why life is so unfair. I'm a strong believer that everything happens for a reason and nevertheless I find it so tough to comprehend the unjustness of it. He was a 16 year old boy with so much potential, so much hope. And now he's gone. I just pray that he's in a better place. 

I don't think my words even begin to do justice for what a sad moment it was, but I wanted to write, so here it is. 

Monday, 16 September 2013

September Thoughts

It's been a crazy month and a half; life got in the way a little bit as it always seems to. If I'm honest I'm not entirely sure where my summer went, somehow ten weeks went in the blink of an eye. But that's time for you I guess, I had a wonderful summer. And now here I am. Here being 3 weeks into my new school, the one I was petrified to begin, and the one I'm actually surviving. I have just finished off some history homework ah the delights of Atlee's government, polished off a cup of tea and a slice of brownie which I made on Saturday and thought I would update you all on some of the happenings of my exhilarating life.

Starting something new is always an odd feeling. I never really know what to expect, and I think that's what scared me when starting my new school. Especially knowing that the majority of my year have been there for five years already. But I'm loving my subjects, not so much my homework, and the people are lovely. Sure, I still spend the best part of my time longing for the weekend but it's not so bad. In fact, I'd even go as far as to say that I'm enjoying myself.

So things are pretty good at the moment, I feel very blessed. I don't want to write too much today as I'm shattered from waking up at 6:30am, which is (and probably always will be) much too early for my liking. I thought I'd leave you with a list of things that are making me happy at the moment that will hopefully (some of them) make you smile too:

- having a completely fresh start where no-one knows me
- meeting new people
- baking
- having incredible friends
- having a wonderful boyfriend
- having a caring family
- reading this post from Alice's blog that made me smile
- reading this post from Meg's blog that made me think
- waking up to sweet messages
- this song, because Bublé never fails to put me in the best mood